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February 19, 2015

VALENTINE RAMBLINGS



Valentine day was here and it’s gone, yea, neatly tucked away till 2016. How did you spend your Valentine’s Day? I know there are different categories of people concerning Val celebrations.

Those who don’t believe in it, these are the tough skinned, my-love-sees clearly, I-am-never-in-a-maze kind of persons. They are not the lovey-dovey, mushy personalities. They most often don’t believe in special dates like anniversaries and may often forget birthdays and special events. To them, they can celebrate love whenever, wherever and however without making a fuss about it. I want to believe they are mostly the focused, clear headed, I see beyond the facade kind of persons.

Those who don’t believe in it because they don’t have anyone to spend the day with are those who over the years have had their hearts broken, smashed and left in tatters. They are “relationship-less” and therefore claim not to believe in the essence of Valentine’s Day. This category of persons will switch sides once they find themselves dating again. They are like the weather; they see the sunny side of life when all is looking rosy and green.

Those of who are unrepentant “lovaholics” and celebrate it unhindered, I fall under this category. We are the advocates of love; we don’t have a reason to celebrate. We just love having gifts and sharing gifts. Also, I might add that under this category are the “follow-follow”, they don’t understand what the day is all about but will rather be caught dead not going with the flow.

And lastly those who are forced to celebrate it (Hubby falls under this category). This category of persons is arm twisted; blackmailed and threatened to celebrate Valentine’s Day. To them it is just a craze and farce by commercial vendors to get people to spend money by ascribing a special status to a day.  

I remember one time in the office that a delivery man brought roses, cake and chocolates to  one of my colleagues...when the delivery man came to the office and asked of her, she was “awwwing” and “haaaaaing”, everyone was peeping wondering where the roses, cake and chocolate came from. Babes begin to elongate their neck to read the tags and know who the mystery man was, as per we all knew she was “boyfriend–less” at this time.  Lo and behold, the florist must have made a mistake because they used her name as the sender and receiver of the roses...oh my days, she was taunted and I am sure she was embarrassed, I was ashamed on her behalf....who in this day and age still does sh*t like this, and if you must do, the watch word is don’t be caught. That’s the day I know babes are not smiling at all.

I don’t think I want to be the babe without a gift for valentine but it has happened to me before, though we ended up having dinner later in the day. Will I go to the extreme and send a gift to myself...nope....will I mope.....I don’t think so, I am hyper like that, I have so much positive energy at times, it scares me as well.....just the same way that I can flip the coin at a short notice. I got the two extremes of introvert and extrovert personality.

Truth be told, I am not so crazy about Valentine celebration as I was some years ago, so I guess maybe Hubby’s prayers might work and I will outgrow it ....my Val celebration was low key when compared with previous years...no particular reason sha, Victoria island traffic was #doromegasuperstar.....and all those “small- small” children like Duru Aldophus Jnr *winks* just filled all the malls and fast food joints.  Shopping for groceries or any other item that day was so tasking, I am thinking of starting a campaign to restricting Valentine’s celebration to just the married and mature adults...kilode...because you want to buy plastic flower and Ferrero Rocher chocolate, you won’t let a whole Auntie Sykik see road again..... hehehehe..........there’s no respect again. Abeg, raise your hand if you support my advocacy, lol...Sykik is a confirmed “agbaya”.

I need to outgrow this Valentine fever because Hubby has jokingly said he hopes when I am old and grey and with no teeth to chop chocolate again, he will rest from Valentine’s Day celebration, (kai, to imagine that such a day will come) and maybe he will be giving me corned beef instead. I had to remind him that he’s some years older, so it’s reassuring that he will be old , grey and without teeth before me...I won’t even feed him with corned beef...I will five him grounded sardine...hehehehe.....old age Valentine love go sweet oh

January 28, 2015

OFFICE APROKO



A pregnant lady in my office lost her pregnancy during the second trimester and I feel so bad about the incidence, but how do you console someone like that. Some persons were telling her it’s better to lose the pregnancy than a grown child but truly is the pain any less............ According to her, she had to go through labour and it wasn’t a funny experience at all. I offered my sympathies and told her my favourite bible quote is Eccl 3: 11 “He has made everything beautiful in its time”...... This verse has been my life line when all seems lost, when I feel all hope is lost and I am spiritually weary. She’s surviving and I feel very soon she will be pregnant again, that’s if she’s not already. Una know say some women body be magnet...they don’t waste time, before Hubby touches them, they haff catch belle, it is well. Even my mind is telling me that my sister-in-law will soon "catch" another belle....because, most people I know seem to go back for repeat course almost immediately after their first babies.

Another lady in my office just had twin boys, her pregnant tummy was extra large so I am not surprised, what left my mouth hanging open is that she’s already a mother to five children. This makes it seven children ........I doff my small “ikebe” for her. It takes a whole lot of courage and strength to born 1, not to talk of 7. There are people who love children and won’t mind having lots and lots of them but even me that haff not born yet can’t comprehend how she has been managing to stay sane and how she intends to stay sane with 7 children. She doesn’t look like someone with 2 children sef; she’s got a very trim body.

Someone shared a story of how his brother’s wife got pregnant after 5 children and then ended up with triplets meaning he has 8 children now; he said his brother went missing for three days upon hearing the good news. They had to report case of missing person to the police oh, when he came back on the third day he said he had to go into recluse and re-strategize because he couldn’t fathom where the triplets came from.......I thought people did scan and other tests to confirm these things.....so, lemme start warning Hubby not to think of running away in case God decides to “open the floodgates of heaven and pour out on us so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it”.....after all it will be worth the years of waiting.

The harmattan haff disappeared oh; it’s so hot in Lagos that I have forgotten that some weeks ago, we were complaining of dust and cold. People too plenty for Lagos sef, the traffic, horn hooting, swearing and cursing, car brushing and rowdiness is back on the road on a #doro-mega-superstar level..........

January 19, 2015

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The year 2015 has started and it has been mixed reactions for me, a part of me is excited about what is in store for me and then there is that part where I question if I should be so enthusiastic with all the bombings, deaths, the missing #Chibok Girls and other ills plaguing Nigeria. It is well, I wonder if God will not one day out of stress wipe out Nigeria just as he did Sodom and Gomorrah.....can any nation have so much issues and still remain so clueless to finding a solution to one of the issues. It’s almost as though we thrive in chaos and abnormalities ....... kilode, na so suffer head sweet us.

Mama Sykik, has fashied my side oh, she has eyes only for her new grandson, I am not jealous sha.... my time will come and it’s so soon. Daddy Sykik is now a bachelor as Mama Sykik has relocated to my brother’s place to help with the baby. It’s not a funny something; Papa Sykik has gba-kamu- sha.

Abeg, how do people get married within months and start worrying about conception immediately, don’t they know that there’s an unwritten rule that you should “enjoyment” the marriage for some weeks or months before babies start arriving. Don’t mind me, jare; I know that in Nigeria people start counting down nine months from the wedding night. Infact, I am sure some “poke-nosers” won’t mind peeping through the window to ensure that the action is taken place and in proper position on the wedding night.

When I grow up, I want to be like @ilola oh, she has been travelling all over the world showcasing her talent and I am mightily proud of her achievements. I have been using her to pose in my office, like say I be her manager or blood sister. This brings me to the question, Sykik, what is your talent? When will all this your talk-talk take you to Brazil? Hehehehe, I need to start learning big-big English and forming cliques in this blog-ville so that you all will keep coming back to read my “meaningful” posts.

In one of my previous posts, I mentioned that ladies in my office are on the “keep fit, stay trim” diet. The other day, I saw a babe who had one of those “nyansh” of life” in the building, as in, this “nyansh” (notice, I didn’t say “ikebe”) is an all time harasser, that thing moves to cause commotion. Can you imagine my shock when I saw her looking all trim and the “nyansh” was almost non- existent? I shock, I freeze, I open mouth and almost fainted......I couldn’t help but ask, Babe, where your “nyansh” go? Why didn’t you tell me to come get some when you were getting it reduced? It’s not fair oh...since thy kingdom come, I have been shouting and crying for small “ikebe”, only for someone with “nyansh” to lose all that “nyansh” and not give me some.  God, why nau?  

January 07, 2015

STARTING WITH GOD



*Sister Sykik is in the building*

Happy New Year my darlings, abeg, no vex that I wasn’t here the first day of the year to wish you a shoki-dancing, hallelujah-screaming, testimony-filled, joy-unspeakable and peace that surpasses human comprehension  year. I am sure 2015 has a lot of goodies in store for each and every one of us. How do I know? It’s because I know the God I serve and his message this year is that

And I will restore to you the years that the locust has eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpillar, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you. You will have plenty to eat, until you are full, and you will praise the name of the LORD your God, who has worked wonders for you; never again will my people be shamed.
Joel 2:25-26

I prophesy into your life that just as the bible has decreed

Do not call to mind the former things, or ponder things of the past. "Behold, I will do something new, Now it will spring forth; Will you not be aware of it? I will even make a roadway in the wilderness, Rivers in the desert.
Isaiah 43:18-19

God is in the business of new beginnings, leave all the doubts behind and hold on to the God who says

As it is written: "I have made you a father of many nations." He is our father in the sight of God, in whom he believed--the God who gives life to the dead and calls into being things that were not.
Romans 4:17

God says in 2015, you will sing a new song, you will dance new dance steps, you will flourish like the palm tree, he will take sickness away from your midst, you will decree and it will come to pass, springs will flow in your dessert, valleys will become plains and mountains will be levelled. Infact, he assured that

"Truly I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them
Mark 11:23

All He wants is a love relationship with you, an assurance that He will always your Le Boo. He wants your undivided commitment, He wants you falling head over heels in love with Him, He wants to hear you whisper those sweet nothings , He wants to give you butterfly flutters in your tummy and turn your world into sparkles.

This God is the Boo of life, the unchangeable changer, the one who says to you 365 times in his word “Do not be afraid” that’s the once a day tablet you need to launch out for each day.

Every day this year-2015, wake up, look to heaven and say to the world. “I am not afraid, because my day is settled in God, the one who owns the earth and all that is in it