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January 22, 2013

Testimony Time

Praise, Praise, praise the Lord…..somebody shout Halleluyah.
First and foremost, I want to thank God for the salvation of my soul……my testimony goes like this……
Last week, I read on  singlenaijamum about her being rewarded for friending a blogger. She got gorgeous gifts in a goodie bag, I have made up my mind to befriend this blogger to get my share . After reading the post, I commented that “I need to mend my ways…… I can be getting surprise gifts like her”.
That’s how the Holy Spirit descended on me like on the day of Pentecost, I come and go to unyimeivy, then I come and see her birthday post , so my spirit come and tell me to drop a comment.. ….my brothers and sisters in the Lord…… me shout halleluyah oh…that is how Unyiwe come and ask me for my e-mail address, so I come and send it to her…….. Praise , Praise, praise the Lord, that is how I opened my mailbox then I come and see that she sent me her book “Burning Hurt”.
I am now a proud owner of a book.
I am here to testify that friending works; I am still expecting another book courtesy another blogger, shebi you know yaself
I know my testimony is permanent in Jesus Name…… Amen……

January 18, 2013

Mark 4:35-40

vs 35:   That day when evening came, he said to his disciples, "Let us go over to the other side."
vs 36:   Leaving the crowd behind, they took him along, just as he was, in the boat. There were also other boats with him.
vs 37:   A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped.
vs 38:   Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, "Teacher, don't you care if we drown?"
vs 39:   He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, "Quiet! Be still!" Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.
vs 40:   He said to his disciples, "Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?"

The waves beat badly against the boat and the water started filling the boat. The disciples were scared and all they could see was a sinking boat.
Scenario 1
They were so overtaken with fear, they forgot in those few minutes that Jesus was with them. All they saw was the sinking boat and the realisation that they were drowning.  Immediately they remembered he was in the same boat with them and “to add salt to injury” he was asleep, I can only imagine the speed with which they must have woken him up, like “hello”, “excuse us” ,“Bros, who sleeps in a boat that is been tossed back and forth on a turbulent sea”…… "Teacher, don't you care if we drown?"

They were forming “Messrs Calm” with the assurance that since the Jesus was in the same boat with them, “no shaking”, “nothing go happen”. Now, imagine their shock when the boat started filling with water and Jesus was still sleeping. Panic mode must have set in and I am guessing they woke him up with their screaming, fearful and quaking voices "Teacher, don't you care if we drown?"

In my post one-of-those-days, I gave in to my fears just as the disciples did and like the loving Father, friend, companion that he is, he rebuked the wind, and said to the sea “peace be still”………..a great calm ensued and the wind ceased.
Why am I so fearful?…he’s God, he’s the one who says he will perfect that which concerns me…….
2 Corinth 12:9 “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Eccl 3:11a “He hath made every thing beautiful in his time”
I am much better now and have shaken off the "beast". Thank you to everyone for caring, I surely can’t begin to describe how loved I feel. 


January 14, 2013


Life is full of ironies.
I don’t know if I should be glad am not treating any major/minor ailment regarding my TTC or be frustrated that despite several medical tests , fertility boosting medication, charting, reproductive assisted techniques its been all futile. I have prayed, fasted, praised and attended several church services. I don tire…..,
I don’t want to give up but at times, it’s really difficult not to feel like shouting at God. If it was in the hands of my earthly father, he would have given me a truckload of children, male and female. *I go don dey beg say it has do sef*
Matthew 7:11 “If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?”
It started at the check-in counter…mothers with their babies, fathers with their children, my heart broke, like literally broke into a million pieces…it was just me and Hubby, no baby pusher, no children …I felt totally empty. I packed my broken heart, cuddled Hubby throughout the flight and muttered prayers intermittently as we made the long journey. Infact, at a point during the flight I asked him if we could adopt a child, so we won’t have to travel “solo” again….. (that’s selfish of me abi, wanting  a child to travel with)
I enjoyed the holiday, except for times when I had to shop for friends with new born babies. I kept asking God when will I shop for my kids, when will Hubby push a buggy in a store. It’s all good, I tell myself.  My time is coming.
Habakkuk 2:3b“…….though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.”
Then Auntie Flow came during the holidays rubbing in the fact that 2012 is gone and it has being twelve months of Little-Red-Riding-Hood visiting even though she’s not welcome.
Fast forward……Holiday over…….. and I had to spend the return leg of my flight with a family of 6 on the same row. The family had 4 kids, (boys and girls), walahi, I don’t know why the devil decided to tempt me so or show me my emptiness? I stared at the kids throughout the flight to the extent that they knew I was staring. I just couldn’t take my eyes off them. It dawned on me why some people steal babies, I almost asked the father to dash me one of his children. How can one person have 4 children and here I am asking for 1 child? This life is surely not fair. I was hurting during that trip so much I could only ask God for grace to start the New Year believing him for my own miracle. At immigration, I almost buckled under the hurt. I had to tell myself to chin up….it’s just the beginning of the year and God has just started with me.
Hubby has been so supportive through these years. He has never ruffled my nest regarding our TTC, he’s being my pillar. I wish it was in my hands, to give life, to cause conception to occur, to carry to term and bring forth.  I know he would glow brighter when we finally bring forth our own children. I desire to give him his own child, his own flesh and blood.
I shouldn’t even start thinking of the fact that my body is aging….. there’s so much a girl can take……… hmmmm…..It is well.