SYKIK FACE YOUR WORK OH

My Neighbor and his wife

My neighbour's maid acts like the boss madam in the house. She has a free hand in the running of the house as the main “oga madam” is never around. The real “oga madam” stays in #obodo oyinbo. While I was on maternity leave, I noticed that this maid opens the maid’s room door to someone late in the night.

Now, to the crux of the matter, my neighbour and his wife had a very bad argument. It was so bad that “oga madam” drove her car out of the house in anger and ran into a stationery vehicle on the street. According to Hubby, “Thank God no one was in the car if not she would have killed someone that day”.

Now to the crux of the matter, "oga madam" believes there’s something between the maid and Oga because she saw some telltale signs.

As a good neighbor I haff faced my work?  ......... #Uchefaceyourworkoh (who remembers the Etisalat audio clip that made headline in 2014). 

IVF BABIES

I was opportune to listen to a discourse on fertility and I was shocked to hear that in 2015 some peeps are still of the opinion that ARTs are not biblical.

It would be nice to read an opinion that actually differs from mine.

I will lay my opinion as I understand it and from the stand point of someone who had to TTC for 9years.

Ezekiel 37:4

Again He said to me, "Prophesy over these bones and say to them, 'O dry bones, hear the word of the LORD.' "Thus says the Lord GOD to these bones, 'Behold, I will cause breath to enter you that you may come to life. 'I will put sinews on you, make flesh grow back on you, cover you with skin and put breath in you that you may come alive; and you will know that I am the LORD.”

Genesis 2:7

And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.

Medical science has been able to fathom that it takes the coming together of a male sperm and a female egg to form a foetus and this has brought about most of the different forms of ARTs  to assist couples who are TTC. However, does this mean that science has discovered how to give life…the answer is NO.

The breath of life belongs to the Omnipotent, Omniscient and only living God. He's the only one who can breath life into the cells formed in the Petri dish during an IVF procedure, he's the only one who can command life into eggs when an IUI procedure is performed. This is the only reason why IVFs fail. If he withholds that breath, the procedure becomes unsuccessful no matter the number of viable eggs transferred into the woman. I came into this realisation during my several procedures. 

It's God that gives life not the OB/GYN. It's not about how good the clinic or how well the procedure went. I have learnt that our trials are all to his glory….remember the story of the blind man

John 9:1-3

As He passed by, He saw a man blind from birth. And His disciples asked Him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind?" Jesus answered, "It was neither that this man sinned, nor his parents; but it was so that the works of God might be displayed in him.…

Our situation and challenges is to show forth his awesomeness. 

If we can take aspirin for pain, go for surgery to correct a defect, then I believe infertility is also just a form of anomaly that needs medical treatment. The irony of it all is that there are more cases of unexplained infertility than explained….ARTs are often the last medical techniques when all other natural measures have been taken.

If you have never known hunger, then you can't understand and describe hunger, likewise if you haven't TTCed you can only imagine what it is to long for a child. It's painful when TTC couple are held bound by society’s belief and can't seek help just because……..

All we hear in churches are testimonies of couples who waited 25,20,15,10years……and suddenly are blessed with triplets, twins and singleton. Nobody says what procedure they had to undertake to have the babies…..all because the children will be stigmatised….if they laugh too much, it will be because they are test tube babies, if they cry na wahala. 

I know a school proprietress who swears she can tell IVF babies apart……Kai……I laugh in Chinese…….for where,…….it's all in her head. 

TTC: trying to conceive

ART: assisted reproductive technology

HOLLA HOLLA.....

Cobweb, he haff full this blog mehn…..lemme go and carry broom to do some cleaning……..

*clears throat*
Abeg, don't vex that I have been AWOL. Hactually, I wasn't hexperred it that I will be away this long but …..it haff happen like that so please helep me, helep me by accepting my apologies.😌

*brings out thank you speech*

Thank you to everyone who congratulated me on the  birth of Bomboy. To everyone who follow my blog and read every post on my TTC journey, I say may you really be blessed. I can't begin to mention names but know that God will reward your labour of love. You all are a blessing and I feel so loved……oya make una chop kiss one my one…..

Thank you…

*curtsies*

Bomboy is doing good and growing so fast its unbelievable.. I had to adjust to life as a mummy and a career woman. Unfortunately I work in a male dominated industry and in the midst of men whose wives are all SAHMs (stay at home mothers).

I will get to doing blog rounds pretty soon……I know it haff tay that I visited una blog…., anyone can help a sister out by giving me better gist of what has been happening in blogville.

SPEECHLESS

There was a time when the thought of getting married and becoming pregnant was scary. I just couldn’t process the thought. I was young, naive and a husband and baby weren’t in the picture. I had the world to conquer. Strangely though, I got married in my mid-twenties and I still can’t fathom when the mind shift happened. I found love, got married but couldn’t bring myself to face the “after-marriage-comes-babies” sequence. I told Hubby I didn’t want to get pregnant and we agreed we won’t start trying for a baby until some months into the marriage. I felt I couldn’t take care of a child, I was scared. Don’t get me wrong, I love babies, I adore them and find those chubby cheeks irresistible. I just didn’t want to have them in my space 24-7...no breaks, no weekends. I wasn’t ready to be a parent.

I think I got pregnant after the first month of marriage because Aunty Flo didn’t visit when she was due, after 2 weeks, I was scared silly and asked a doctor friend to prescribe pills to make Aunty Flo visit. I took the pill and as sure as dawn, Aunty Flo came 24hrs...phew...it was a close shave.

About a year later, we started trying to conceive consciously. Like play, like play, it seemed Aunty Flo had given herself a monthly residence in our abode...the more we tried to keep her out, the more determined she was to continue her monthly visit. Then, the tests started, the prayers ,the ARTs, the medication and then more prayers laced with fasting. I lost my faith and found it several times during my TTC journey. I cried, I ached and I thought I would die but God kept me. I lost count of how many times I lashed out at God and my Hubby, there was no pretence with them, while I seemed calm to the outside world.

I found peace along the line, I knew it wasn’t me...it was a grace beyond my frailty. I remember once, a friend said, “Sykik, you don’t behave like someone who’s looking for a child”. Many women saw me and asked how I can be so calm and composed........I smiled and always said “when you want something so badly that you have done everything within your physical might and realise it’s beyond your power, you just can’t help but say I don’t give up, but I am sure going to live my life”. I used my blog as an outlet to pour out my heart wrenching emotions, my blog helped keep my sanity.

There was also the several, “Sykik, I know a doctor” or “Sykik, my pastor said”, or “Sykik, my church is having a programme”. I felt trapped with the unsolicited phone numbers, prayers and advice. Then there were times during church service when the pastor will ask women who are waiting for the fruit of the womb to step out........what about the men?  I was an “aluta” TTC mama...I didn’t want to be cloaked into the regular TTC woman. I wanted to pray without being compelled to pray, I wanted to talk to people without being drowned with advices about the best sex position to keep the sperm inside the vayjayjay...,.....kai, ........the list is endless.............

Sykik's Song of Praise

Luke 1

…47And my spirit has rejoiced in God my Savior. 48"For He has had regard for the humble state of His bondslave; For behold, from this time on all generations will count me blessed. 49"For the Mighty One has done great things for me; And holy is His name.…

 

What is this post about sef......... it’s to announce that Sykik is now "mama bornboy". Baby’s birth was some months ago.

IT GETS MORE WEIRD

One Sunday night, I was craving fried yam like my life depended on it.......When Hubby no “gree” look my side, I started crying. I was a pitiable sight,  it was almost like if I didn't eat fried yam that night ehn, I won't survive. We started driving all over our area looking for fried yam, after several referrals we got someone who was frying at a bus stop. Immediately I perceived the smell of the fried yam, I started inhaling the smell like it was food, the food vendor took one look at me and shook her head and said “madam, sorry, it is well, this phase will pass”.

Another instance was during work hours, I was walking through my office car park and I saw a man eating jollof rice in his car, I stood beside the car and was watching how the rice was entering this man’s mouth, at a point the man turned and stared at me. I am sure he was wondering if I was a mad woman, I just curtsied, apologised and "waka-ed" away.

I told myself that I need to start having self control because “tush” Sykik cannot be falling hand like this oh......which kain pregnancy symptom be "ojukokoro" again.

Constipation garnished with carpel tunnel syndrome and a slice of "ojukokoro" is not sexy and tush at all.....pregnancy is not a easy something.

Ps: Please someone should help me interprete "ojukokoro" into English in the comment section.

IN THE BEGINNING - 2

Act 1, Scene 2

I had just finished a bowl of vegetable with white rice and feeling fly. Some minutes later, I felt as though I had eaten too much and the food was stuck in my throat. I started having breathing problems…..I started trying “orisirisi” because the discomfort was outta of this world. I couldn't sit or stand. For several days, I was groaning trying to force poo out, but it was doing me “odeshi”. I thought I was going to die and didn't appreciate my obituary reading “she died because she couldn't  poo”.

I prayed to God and swore myself off rice and vegetable, I swore myself off food sef……It was hell. If this was just one pregnancy symptom I dreaded what the others will be. Finally, day eight came and God answered my prayer and I was able to poo. I started singing praise and worship, glorifying “baba God” for the ability to poo. I never knew there was ever going to be a day that I will be singing and dancing because of poo. Oh what relieve I felt. At that moment, life was good.

I woke up some days later with a sharp pain in my right hand, down my wrist to my elbow……what happen again, wharris this? Did I sleep on my right hand ni? like play, like play…..2 weeks, this pain didn't go away, rather  I couldn't hold on to objects, I was breaking plates and cups , infact anything I held with my right hand ended up broken…..so I went to the hospital requesting for an X-Ray. I was told it was capel tunnel syndrome and a pregnancy symptom……..pregnancy symptom bawo……..Doctor?……..I began to wonder why I was having weird pregnancy symptoms?

To my highly esteemed “female toilet gist lovers” ……sorry oh, no office aproko gist until further notice……

IN THE BEGINNNING

Act 1, Scene 1

Sykik: hello, Dr. E, did you get the picture and mail I sent to you

Dr E: Sykik, congratulations, the double line means you are pregnant

Sykik: ok, thank you

It's been a roll coaster nine months , at first it was unbelief.....no scratch that, I couldn't comprehend the singular sentence "congratulations, you are pregnant" , it was an out of body experience because, every symptom I felt was telling me, Auntie Flo was about to pay her monthly visit and as usual was making a dramatic entrance. My understanding of morning sickness was nausea, vomiting , weird food cravings, etc

My reaction to the doctors’ news was unbelievably calm. I didn't scream, cry, jump or anything. I just said thank you doctor, dropped the phone and crawled back into bed........who does that?.......Sykik is definitely a weirdo........this was one news I have waited the past nine years to hear and all I could do was go back to sleep...... Wait a second, before I went back to sleep, I turned to Hubby and told him what the doctor said.

Fast forward to two weeks after, I was hit by the worst constipation ever known to man.  

FEELING GOOD

There have been times when;

I have been consumed by worry,

I have allowed my tears to blind me,

I allowed fear to overwhelm your mightiness

I felt I couldn’t go on,

I felt like crawling into a hole,

I felt my heart will stop beating,

I cried out….. God where are you?

And

There have been times when;

I couldn’t but shout for joy,

I couldn’t help bursting out in laughter,

I couldn’t dance enough,

I felt overwhelming love,

I felt unmerited favour

I felt on top of the world

I cried out….Baba God you too much

Michael Buble’s version of the song “Feeling Good" best describes how I feel this very moment.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Edwsf-8F3sI&gl=NG&hl=en-GB

VALENTINE RAMBLINGS

Valentine day was here and it’s gone, yea, neatly tucked away till 2016. How did you spend your Valentine’s Day? I know there are different categories of people concerning Val celebrations.

Those who don’t believe in it, these are the tough skinned, my-love-sees clearly, I-am-never-in-a-maze kind of persons. They are not the lovey-dovey, mushy personalities. They most often don’t believe in special dates like anniversaries and may often forget birthdays and special events. To them, they can celebrate love whenever, wherever and however without making a fuss about it. I want to believe they are mostly the focused, clear headed, I see beyond the facade kind of persons.

Those who don’t believe in it because they don’t have anyone to spend the day with are those who over the years have had their hearts broken, smashed and left in tatters. They are “relationship-less” and therefore claim not to believe in the essence of Valentine’s Day. This category of persons will switch sides once they find themselves dating again. They are like the weather; they see the sunny side of life when all is looking rosy and green.

Those of who are unrepentant “lovaholics” and celebrate it unhindered, I fall under this category. We are the advocates of love; we don’t have a reason to celebrate. We just love having gifts and sharing gifts. Also, I might add that under this category are the “follow-follow”, they don’t understand what the day is all about but will rather be caught dead not going with the flow.

And lastly those who are forced to celebrate it (Hubby falls under this category). This category of persons is arm twisted; blackmailed and threatened to celebrate Valentine’s Day. To them it is just a craze and farce by commercial vendors to get people to spend money by ascribing a special status to a day.  

I remember one time in the office that a delivery man brought roses, cake and chocolates to  one of my colleagues...when the delivery man came to the office and asked of her, she was “awwwing” and “haaaaaing”, everyone was peeping wondering where the roses, cake and chocolate came from. Babes begin to elongate their neck to read the tags and know who the mystery man was, as per we all knew she was “boyfriend–less” at this time.  Lo and behold, the florist must have made a mistake because they used her name as the sender and receiver of the roses...oh my days, she was taunted and I am sure she was embarrassed, I was ashamed on her behalf....who in this day and age still does ^sh*t like this, and if you must do, the watch word is don’t be caught. That’s the day I know babes are not smiling at all.

I don’t think I want to be the babe without a gift for valentine but it has happened to me before, though we ended up having dinner later in the day. Will I go to the extreme and send a gift to myself...nope....will I mope.....I don’t think so, I am hyper like that, I have so much positive energy at times, it scares me as well.....just the same way that I can flip the coin at a short notice. I got the two extremes of introvert and extrovert personality.

Truth be told, I am not so crazy about Valentine celebration as I was some years ago, so I guess maybe Hubby’s prayers might work and I will outgrow it ....my Val celebration was low key when compared with previous years...no particular reason sha, Victoria island traffic was #doromegasuperstar.....and all those “small- small” children like Duru Aldophus Jnr ^*winks* just filled all the malls and fast food joints.  Shopping for groceries or any other item that day was so tasking, I am thinking of starting a campaign to restricting Valentine’s celebration to just the married and mature adults...kilode...because you want to buy plastic flower and Ferrero Rocher chocolate, you won’t let a whole Auntie Sykik see road again..... hehehehe..........there’s no respect again. Abeg, raise your hand if you support my advocacy, lol...Sykik is a confirmed “agbaya”.

I need to outgrow this Valentine fever because Hubby has jokingly said he hopes when I am old and grey and with no teeth to chop chocolate again, he will rest from Valentine’s Day celebration, (kai, to imagine that such a day will come) and maybe he will be giving me corned beef instead. I had to remind him that he’s some years older, so it’s reassuring that he will be old , grey and without teeth before me...I won’t even feed him with corned beef...I will five him grounded sardine...hehehehe.....old age Valentine love go sweet oh