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September 12, 2014

MAMA SYKIK .....



I remember the day mama Sykik found a love letter in my closet.

Back in the days, love letters where the “ish”, it was the means through which boys wooed babes. I  have mentioned in some earlier posts that I was a late bloomer so I didn’t get boys paying attention to me till my undergrad years........there was the random boy, here and there but Mama Sykik played her “breathing down my back” role so well and co-opted my brothers into saving their sister’s purity till marriage.

There was this boy who had taken a big brother/boyfriend role over me in school, come to think of it he never toasted me sha. The boy had to change schools in our second year and so we were separated and there were no GSM phones then. It was a tough time for me, I felt lost and so when I got a letter from this bobo (he sent it through a student who had visited his school). I read the letter every day and mumuishly took the letter with me home during the holidays....somehow Mama Sykik poke nosed through my stuff and read the letter, this was a letter I kept well folded inside my bible (I had to keep the letter holy abi nau). Mama Sykik doesn’t understand that there is anything called boundaries or personal space. After this incident, I learnt the trick of Eneke the bird that “since men have learned to shoot without missing, he has learned to fly without perching." I learnt to keep my privacy from her prying eyes.

I got home from my Mum’s store that day and met Mama Sykik at the door, brandishing my love letter (she doesn’t waste time attacking) immediately I saw the letter, I died and travelled to heaven..........it was easier facing God than Mama Sykik, I swear. She was gangster like that.....all I heard again was

Mama Sykik: Sykik am I not talking to you
Sykik: Ma, what did you say (My heart was skipping and I still couldn’t make sense of what she was saying)
Mama Sykik: are you listening to me at all, since you are deaf, let me explain myself better

Mama Sykik delivered one of those her “abara” slap, “abara”- is a back slap that brings you out of a coma. It works; ask any Nigerian Yoruba girl who grew up in the 80s and 90s. That “abara” brought me back from my coma and I can’t remember what my explanation was, but I must have confessed to sins committed and uncommitted. I was made to promise to break up with this bobo and cease all form of communication. After the beating and threats of that day, I am sure I never spoke to any man except my brothers for weeks.

How do you break up with someone who never toasted you sef? I told bobo about the incident and we just remained discreet until Mama Sykik caught us again and this time around she drafted Papa Sykik to cast the “spell of boyfriend” from my life.

I love Mama Sykik and  wouldn’t trade her for anything, though back in the days I had no “relationship” with her because I felt her parenting methods were cruel but I won’t be half of  who I am today without that strict grooming. Papa Sykik blended her parenting skills with his modern methods which she felt was “ajebutterish” but see me today, I turned out right even if I have to say so myself.

Will I trade my growing up years  for anything......NO......will I train my child(ren) same way......not really......but I am certainly going to do some “abara” giving or how else will they know I am a Yoruba mummy...lol....and God loves a cheerful giver :) 

40 comments:

  1. Kai na wa o. For ur mum to be giving you abara while you were already in university, mehn, I must say she was strict... almost to the extreme. Anyway, I'm glad you turned out a good product of hers.

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    1. Lol @ almost to the extreme.....thank God I turned out right

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  2. lol too funny, i totally remember those days of abara's.

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    1. So you chopped some abaras too...:)

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  3. Mothers are just that...mothers...

    You sef, you come take love letter home from school...undersmart dey worry you ni?...lol

    Were you a literature student? That was what came to my mind on getting to the 'eneke' part.

    Hilarious post as usual.

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    1. I was naive nau, I didn't know I shouldn't have taken the letter home....strange but I still have the letter till date

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  4. Lmaooo@immediately I saw the letter, I died and travelled to heaven..........it was easier facing God than Mama Sykik, I swear
    My mom was the same o. Just one sole abara was all it took to reset me mehn

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    1. Kai, who ever invented the abara must be mean....it's a trusted and tested means of resetting teenage brains back in the days

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  5. AHAHAHAHAHAHA, yes o! Mothers back in the 80's and 90's were not smiling o! I like mama sykik o jare.

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    1. Mama Sykik, was eryainly not smiling....I love her to bits now but not back then sha...I was always dreaming of how to switch mothers in my teenage years

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  6. LOOOOL.. Once I saw the title 'Mama Sykik', I couldn't wait to read hehehe
    Love letters mehn.. The truth is that no matter how strict a parent is, man musto love - there's always a way... Many teenagers have suffered many-an-abaras for the sake of love hehehe xx

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    1. Really, so teenagers still suffer abara because of love.....I bet most of the puppy love ends with teenage years

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  7. lol @ abara. hahahaha. you were bold oh to have even carried the letter inside mama sykiks house. If it was my house you would have done 3 complete days deliverance. hahaha.
    A round of applause to all our mothers who did everything they could to protect their daughters (abara or karate, it all worked. lol)
    Hugs dear.
    favoredwoman

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    1. Lol @ deliverance service....yeah, abara or karate...it worked

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  8. **In Mz.z Sykiks voice.....""“abara”- is a back slap that brings you out of a coma. It works; ask any Nigerian Yoruba girl who grew up in the 80s and 90s. That “abara” brought me back from my coma and I can’t remember what my explanation was, but I must have confessed to sins committed and uncommitted."...... hehehehehehehehehehe goddamnbullshit, hehehehehe now that is just drop dead funny aswear. kai i haf die!

    In other news, i for one believe that being too strict on a child is always a sure recipe for disaster, as on the long run, every child will come to a point of self realization. Sadly being too strict will lead the child more towards being Inquisitive to know what is being sooo guarded against, as against realizing that ""oh well i have been there and done that and there is nothing to it". This was a fun Read aswear.. Sykik more posts, more more more... Posts. bikonu. :) You know Fun bloggers like you should be posting daily :) Trust the ghen ghen work is going well? Dont resign oh!

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    1. I think it can go either way, some of us turn out right and some turn out wrong.

      I haven't resigned yet...it's getting nearer though

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  9. My parents were also very strict, the day my father found a picture of my boyfriend and i hugging each other was the day i knew hell was real. My father beat the living daylight out of me

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    1. Eyah....pele....so our parents were cut from the same cloth.....:)

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  10. loool awwww it's even good atleast I know you will train your children well well. Let me sharply come and pay brideprice in advance!

    Is it bad that i already teach DS small small especially when he's throwing a tantrum and wouldn't eat hehe

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    1. My inlaw, I will send our list to you soon...we are not greedy.....lol....@simplymee will have to answer you on the tantrum oh...I never get experience in this matter...but I am using side eye to look you....we are allowed to throw tantrums at this age o jare...

      Bear hugs

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  11. LMAO!!!! But you were already in university now, that's just too funny. Reminds me of one time my Dad was with my phone and one olodo sent me one useless text message, I kept telling my Dad the boy and I had nothing, this man seized my phone for weeks. I was just tired.

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    1. Lol.....Hope no other text messages came in during the period he had the phone....Mama Sykik doesn't send whether you dey graduate school sef

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  12. Lol!!! Most of the mamas of those times where like that! And I am also glad I got some of those slaps...but I am always surprised how "weak" some of them can get when they have to deal with their grandchildren.

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    1. Wow, so they turn all mushy mushy with grand kids...

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  13. Abara giving..abara taking..boy oh boy, those days... kai!
    Hail mama Sykik for us.

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  14. Abara giving..abara taking..boy oh boy, those days... kai!
    Hail mama Sykik for us.

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  15. Knock Knock Knock... Mzz Sykik we want new Post oh pleaaasseee.. **Wears my Mr Nigeria most charming smile :)

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    1. I have been away and just got back. I will do a post soon, abeg no vex...:)

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  16. You go fear the power of almighty abara! ...my own mom get one kain threatening look that comes before the abara, if she gives you that look and you don't get it, nna your punishment is waiting for you in a cooler at home!

    Thumbs up to the #mama sykiks who molded us!

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    1. thumbs up oh. I am grateful for the abaras

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  18. Blessings.....
    Often the saying "with age comes wisdom" is very true. It is always wise to realize that our parents are people too, flawed and undoubtedly human.

    Stay blessed.
    I have an award for you back at my place. Kindly stop by and pick it up.
    thanks....

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    1. thanks ma'am, will visit your blog

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  19. You've been tagged. Here ma :http://www.toinlicious.blogspot.com/2014/10/the-20s-tag.html

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    1. chai, diaris God oh....lol...thanks babe

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  20. Absolutely hilarious.... True Nigerians can relate. Lol

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    1. welcome dearie...sure, Nigerians can relate

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